The Love Letter You Should Be Writing Routinely ⋆ Earth and Water

I wrote my fair share of love letters in grade school. I’m pretty confident every crush I ever had as a young girl had a love letter written to them. My hopeless romantic self probably gave them all out too, though I don’t remember the details.

My husband still carries one in his wallet that I wrote for him when we were in high school 10ish or so years ago. It’s written in probably five different colored inks and transitions from poetry to heart felt words to inside jokes that wouldn’t make sense to outsiders.

We’re so keen to write a love letter to our heart’s prospects, spilling out our emotions that are so often discarded. I believe in love stories but in reality not many people are going to carry that love letter around with them for 10+ years.

Wouldn’t it be much more productive if we channeled this energy toward cultivating the relationship with ourselves? We could be our own fairy tale and romantic comedy. Treating ourselves like the princess in the stories of forbidden love. We can’t wait on the prince to come along and rescue our self worth, though. We have to take the initiative to be the warrior queen that’s going to rescue our own damn selves.

Cultivate Positive Self Talk

Cultivating a strong and loving relationship with yourself is crucial to success in life. I say “Success” meaning however you define it, since it’s definition varies between each of us. Unless you love yourself enough to know your worth and what you deserve, you’ll never have the confidence to pursue your desires.

Writing yourself love letters is a form of journaling that can be used to enhance this personal and oh so important relationship. Our own inner voice is the one we hear most in our lives. When it’s kind, loving and understanding, we flourish. Far too often, though, it’s our toughest critic.

Negative self talk can be as destructive as verbal abuse from another. Routinely practicing flipping the script on the dialogue into a more constructive manner can make all of the difference in your world.

The Logistics of a Love Letter

Take a moment to meditate on the feeling love; in and of itself, unattached to anything. Close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, focusing on your heart chakra. This is where your highest self resides. Your spirit. It’s where all of your love for everything in existence stems from. Let the feeling swell in your heart center and fill every crevice of your being.

When you’re ready to begin writing, start it with a lovely greeting of “My dear goddess” or “Dear Beautiful”. Like any good love letter, you want to woo your potential mate. Your potential mate in this sense being yourself. And most of us have a very stubborn and uninterested self to woo. So, try hard.

If you need to, pretend you’re speaking to someone you love but replace details with pieces of yourself. For example, if you were to tell someone you love their eyes, imagine your own eyes and describe them in a loving manner. Pick out traits and aspects of yourself you can compliment. Don’t say one negative word. Keep everything high vibrational.

Express gratitude for yourself. If you can’t find things to be thankful about or compliment, get general. Thank your lungs for breathing. Your eyes for seeing. Express happiness over the fact that you can read and write. There were/are so many who are denied this simple ability that we take for granted.

Turning It into a Practice

The less self love you have for yourself, the more often you should do this practice. Try every night before bed writing a letter to yourself. Acknowledge your achievements for the day. Actively write down any forgiveness you need to give yourself. Reflect on the day, your thoughts, actions and any progress you may note.

Know that we are all doing the best we can with what we have available to us at any given moment. Cut yourself some slack. You’re trying. If you’re reading this post, you’re trying. If you practice this exercise even once, you’re trying. Allow these positive practices to gain momentum.

If you need help getting started, ask someone who loves you to help you write your first self love letter. Get them to tell you what they like about you, but I urge you not to use others as a crutch for this practice. The goal is to be able to find things for yourself. You don’t want to rely on your self worth coming from others. Ever ever. So IF you HAVE to get someone’s help, only do it for the first letter and then make sure you try one on your own tomorrow.

If you’d like to explore banishing your insecurities even more, check out my self love course Magnificence Illuminated.