How to Conquer Addictions & Heal Beliefs in Order to Manifest Fulfillment & Purpose ⋆ Earth and Water

I had a cousin I was very close to that we lost 1/23. We were the same age and, despite being at different (still both local) schools, we were together so much that we told people we were twins. More or less inseparable until we were 16, our paths then forked into very different lives.

Addiction didn’t kill him, but it did. He was only 32 when he contracted the flu and things cascaded quickly to his death due to the damage that various hard drugs had done to his body. Multiple trips to rehab hadn’t made a difference in his addiction but it had made an impact on him personally.

He told me of the friends he had made in there. How deeply he understood their struggles and how his heart ached most for those addicted to alcohol because there was no other substance so readily available. He had been thankful that his drugs of choice were harder to come by. That he couldn’t simply walk into a store and buy them.

We often think of addiction in stark terms: needles and empty bottles. In his case, this was the human experience that he fell victim to. But the truth is, addiction’s grasp extends far beyond traditional substances. Our very behaviors, from the seemingly harmless to the overtly destructive, can become compulsive and all-consuming.

This post and episode isn’t intended to minimize any of that and the damage that it does to so many. It’s meant to bring awareness to the addictions not so obvious but also wreaking havoc on our lives. Addictions that often fly under the radar.

Food addiction, for instance, can do an equal amount of damage, just over a longer period of time. I don’t just mean over eating. The standard American diet (SAD) is often characterized by an excess of:

Processed foods: Convenient and often shelf-stable, but typically loaded with unhealthy fats, added sugars, sodium, and artificial ingredients.
Refined carbohydrates: White bread, pastries, sugary cereals – these lack the fiber and nutrients found in whole grains, leading to blood sugar spikes and crashes.
Unhealthy fats: Saturated and trans fats, found in fried foods, fatty meats, and some processed snacks, can increase your risk of heart disease.
Added sugars: Sodas, sugary drinks, and hidden sugars in foods that you wouldn’t expect (like spaghetti sauce) contribute to weight gain, diabetes, and other health problems.

I talked heavily about this in a podcast episode you can find over here and how this combination of foods is the largest part of most of our diets. This way of eating is slowly spreading through the rest of the world and declining our overall health in the process.

Obesity and Weight Gain: The high calorie content and processed nature of the SAD makes it easy to consume more calories than you burn, leading to weight gain and obesity. Most of us live a very sedentary lifestyle but we’re eating calories as though we’re working out constantly.
Heart Disease: Unhealthy fats, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure, all potentially linked to the SAD, are major risk factors for heart disease, the leading cause of death in the United States.
Type 2 Diabetes: The refined carbohydrates and added sugars in the SAD can overwhelm your body’s ability to regulate blood sugar, leading to type 2 diabetes.
Metabolic Syndrome: This cluster of conditions, including high blood pressure, unhealthy cholesterol levels, and insulin resistance, is associated with the SAD and increases your risk of heart disease, stroke, and type 2 diabetes.
Certain Cancers: Research suggests a link between the SAD and an increased risk of certain cancers, such as colorectal cancer.

Beyond these specific health risks, the SAD is also the source of many people’s problems with other common ailments such as:

Digestive issues: The lack of fiber and the presence of processed foods can disrupt your gut microbiome and lead to digestive problems like constipation and bloating.
Chronic inflammation: The high intake of processed foods and unhealthy fats can lead to chronic inflammation, which is linked to a variety of health problems.
Fatigue and low energy: Blood sugar spikes and crashes associated with the SAD can leave you feeling tired and lacking in energy.

The dangers of the SAD are cumulative and develop over time. However, making changes towards a healthier diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean protein, and healthy fats can significantly counteract the damage done. Food addiction can manifest as emotional eating or a relentless pursuit of unhealthy choices, despite negative consequences on health and well-being.

Similarly, exercise addiction can push individuals to overtrain, neglecting other areas of life and risking injury in a desperate chase for the endorphin rush or bodily acceptance. These “behavioral addictions” are often overlooked or dismissed, but they can be just as debilitating as substance abuse. Recognizing the potential for addiction in everyday behaviors is crucial in promoting overall well-being and fostering a healthy relationship with the activities we engage in.

After all, it’s all about finding the balance between the yin and yang. Too much of anything can be problematic.

The initial grip of addiction is often subtle. Social gatherings become fueled by alcohol, and the initial escape it offers becomes a necessity. Initially, it feels as though it’s filling all of the gaps we’ve been searching for.

If allowed to run away unchecked, things can escalade quickly and it becomes an abusive relationship masked like a love affair. Then, real relationships suffer, responsibilities become neglected, and eventually (sometimes decades later, admittedly ((& still, many never even realize that))) the shame of dependence intensifies the cycle. The physical toll is undeniable. Intuitively, we know what we need and don’t need. It’s just a matter of whether or not we’re willing to listen and implement change.

Addiction can grip individuals from all walks of life. It starts innocently enough, perhaps a drink to unwind after a long day, but slowly it transforms, weaving a web of dependence that isolates and consumes. But even in the darkest depths of addiction, there is hope. Here, we explore the struggles of addiction in all of it’s forms and illuminate the path to recovery in the simplest and most desirable way possible.

Breaking free from the suffocating hold of anything you want to quit requires a multi-pronged approach. The first, most crucial step is acknowledging the problem exists. Denial can be a powerful barrier, but recognizing the need for change is the cornerstone of recovery. Seeking professional help is paramount. Therapists can equip individuals with coping mechanisms and address the underlying emotional issues that may have fueled the addiction.

Support groups offer a lifeline of understanding and shared experience. Connecting with others who have walked a similar path fosters a sense of belonging and reduces the feeling of isolation. Community had the biggest impact on my cousin. And even though he wasn’t able to save himself, he did succeed in saving countless others from both his and similarly related fates caused by some form of addiction.

Detoxification can mean a multitude of things (I wrote a whole book on it twice called Detox Diadem (no, you can’t have a copy until I redo it a 3rd time. Schedule a call with me instead and expect an official book release in like 20 years when my kids are grown and I have too much time on my hands finally for such things)). Focus on the energy of it, behind the words, and see it span across every category of your life. The desire to clean and clear it all.

The road to recovery is seldom smooth. Relapses are a possibility, but they don’t have to signal defeat. Progress is progress. View them as setbacks, opportunities to learn and strengthen your resolve. Building a support system of loved ones who understand addiction and offer encouragement is crucial. Self-care practices like healthy eating, regular exercise, and relaxation techniques can also play a vital role in managing stress and preventing relapse.

Recovery from any type of addiction is a marathon, not a sprint. With dedication, professional help, and unwavering support, it is possible to break free from it’s grip and reclaim your life. Remember, you are not alone in this battle. There are resources available, and a future filled with hope and possibility.

Beginning –

Culturally, we think that we need to ‘stop’ doing the things that we’re already doing in order to obtain a goal that we have. Human’s brains aren’t wired for that to be easy, though. Stopping something is hard and stressful for most of us.

What we should be doing instead is ‘start doing’ the things we would like to replace those undesirable habits with. This inevitably ‘crowds out’ that which isn’t serving us and leaves only that which is in alignment with our true desires. This can be equated to any habits and intentionally and purposefully choosing our habits is exactly how we create new ones that help us reach our desired outcomes.

Most everyone try to start with the action of the habit and trying to change it. A better starting place would be with the belief systems around the action.

Why are you continuing to choose this habit?
What do you believe it’s doing for you?
When or where did this stem from? Where’s the root?

Even cravings are simply thoughts.

Everyone has some sort of trauma. There’s no way to avoid it. There are, of course, varying degrees of severity. Some of us have very nurturing environments, support systems and the mindset to be able to take these events in stride. Most of us don’t, and we turn to all sorts of poor habits to help get us through the emotional turmoil and damage.

We can become addicted to all sorts of things, not just substances. Shopping, gambling, working out, food or anything in between can become an addiction. In order to become who we want to be, deserve to be, were born to be, we have to learn how to overcome these addictions that are holding us back.

Some addictions, like alcohol, food or maybe even working out, are seen as more or less socially acceptable. We know alcoholism is a problem but it’s also part of the culture to offer someone a glass of wine if they’ve had a hard day or something. Poor or excessive food choices are just as dangerous for us as other types of addictions, but it’s socially acceptable to pass out candy and cookies or serve up highly processed junk.

There are a lot of misconceptions about addiction, like everyone who becomes addicted to something has history of trauma but this doesn’t seem to hold up to the research. Also, not everyone who turns to substance abuse becomes addicted.

10:00 –

Aside from trauma, there are a multitude of reasons that someone may end up addicted to something like alcohol. Culture is the biggest, not only culture from a community stand point but also the culture of the career you go into may have you repeatedly exposed. Genetics, how your parents were and government regulation of the substance can all have an effect on the likelihood of addiction on a certain individual.

We tend to like to look down on these people, insisting that they should just do better and that we would never find ourselves making the same decisions as someone detrimentally addicted to something. The truth is though, if we were them, we would be making the same choices because their experiences and encounters have led them to make the decisions that they do/did. Whatever is going on with someone else could have just as easily been us given the right circumstances for it.

Availability is a large factor. Addictions like alcohol are more readily available which lends to more people becoming addicted.

Many get introduced to these things as teens or children. This makes it incredibly important to have a solid line of communication and trust set up between parents and their children in order to help them navigate these situations when they arise. “You can’t prepare the path for the children but you can prepare the children for the path.”

You really have to work at cultivating the relationship with your children when their young so that when they become teens, they’ll consider your advice. They’re going to get advice from somewhere and if they don’t trust and respect you, they may be getting it from their friends who may not have their best interest at hand.

“Do as I say, not as I do” doesn’t work. Children are going to copy the behavior they see modeled for the most part so we should be doing our best to model appropriate behavior in all things from substances to emotional regulation. Sheltering children from the struggles of life does them more harm than good. We should be preparing the to the best of our abilities for the struggles they may face and that means being honest with them about how things are when the time is appropriate to do so.

Many people with autism and/or ADHD turn to alcohol because it helps their symptoms. Anxiety is also lessened with alcohol, making people attracted to it.

30:45 –

There are a lot of therapeutic modalities that we can use to help us gain control over our addictions. Yoga, massage, dance and other physical activities help to get us into our bodies and focusing on what we feel there. Often times what we’re trying to do with alcohol is mask the things we’re feeling. If instead we can sit with and work through these feelings, we can come out the other side healed and no longer needing the substance to numb it.

We store the pain and trauma in our bodies. They continue to cause us pain and issues until we address them. It’s an ancient concept that’s only just now starting to become mainstream. We’ve equated emotions to being something that’s just in our heads but they’re very much physical and have a very real impact on our physical bodies.

Children can often be the triggering point to make people second guess their decisions. Sitting back and looking at your priorities is what we all need to do anyway, regularly. That often means just having the space and opportunity to take the time to do so, which most of us don’t take in our very yang culture. We feel like we have to be filling every moment of our day with something productive but sometimes the most productive thing we can do is stare off into space and think about things.

Most problems will go away if we have someone in our corner who is actively listening, validating and simply allowing the space for us to process what we need to process in a supportive tone.

If you don’t do the inner work that’s causing the problem in the first place, if you attempt to just quit the habit you’ll often end up just replacing it with another.

Our yang culture has us participating in everything excessively. The balance is in incorporating the yin as well. Entrepreneurs are widely known for this.

We have to upkeep what we have. Our homes, our bodies, our relationships, etc and all between. If we don’t upkeep what we already have, we can’t hope to get more. This means allowing for the down time, the cleaning and some of the more seemingly mundane things that are a natural part of life, even if they may not be as fun as some of the counter parts.

You have to consider the mundane things in life as also part of your job. It’s your job to take care of your body. Our job is to manage our mental health proactively. It’s our job to make sure we’re managing anything in our life that may become a problem. It’s all a mindset.

https://www.bhaskaranbrown.com/get-over-uk

About Our Guest

Duncan Bhaskaran Brown

Speaker. Author. Morris Dancer.

www.BhaskaranBrown.com

Some people say that Duncan can help you to go beyond alcohol. But that isn’t it. Duncan will help you increase your energy, power up your productivity, improve your relationships and enjoy the heck out of life.

After 20 years of overdoing it, he cleaned up his act and trained with the world’s most successful stop smoking service. But that wasn’t enough. He studied at Cornell University, the Chartered Management Institute and in a windowless room in Peterborough. But that wasn’t enough.

He wrote a couple of books, most recently ‘Real Men Quit’, the armchair macho guide to beating booze and finding the life you want. But that wasn’t enough. He’s started interviewing the sober superstars and conducting research projects which involved watching TV. But that wasn’t enough.

What would be enough? Maybe if alcohol-free was the default, if sober was the new normal and if alcohol stops destroying people. Maybe then Duncan will sit down with a mint tea and sci-fi novel and relax. Maybe.